"BYE"

I am crying and I can’t stop… tried to bid farewell to him, it’s hard and a part of me is still trying to tell me to take that simple “bye” back. God, if he only knows how much I love him, if he only knows……… I really wish I never met him I really do… I really do…. I feel miserable… I feel like I’m dying… I’ve never been in this much pain my entire life… and it’s all because of that stupid mistake of trying this sort of thing, I should have not tried this one, I should have stopped myself but apart of me is saying that he’s the best thing that ever happened to me, he made live again and if he did give me that life he so kindly took it away from me…. Or did i or will I? Maybe I should….

I don’t know where to go… I don’t know how to continue, I wish life’s just like watching a video, with a single click you can pause a moment, despite the fact that if you rewind it, the same scene is bound to happen, at least you will have the time to stop for awhile and try to recuperate before you go forward. I don’t know what it will take for me to forget him but I do wish I find out soon… before it’s too late…..